Imagine how refreshing the air would be
in a community of open, caring honesty,
without that hidden bucket of hurts
fermenting under the kitchen sink.
Recently I read these words and saw my hurt fermenting in a particular bucket under a particular sink. That same week, I listened to others who’d been hurt and were gathering the courage to name it and talk about it with their offender. God was clearly prompting me to speak up.
I get butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. The last thing in the world I want to do is talk about my hurt with the person who hurt me.
If I open the door that hides that bucket, I know I’ll see the hurts I’ve caused in there too. Most likely the one I offended would point them out gently, but too easily I imagine a barrage of rotting garbage being flung at me. Do I really want to open that door?
No, but apparently God does.
I sit with God and try to figure out what I might say. My fight or flight reflex kicks into action. I take some deep breaths till it settles down. I play out different scenarios of how things might go, but this brings me no peace.
Eventually, I hear God simply say, “I’ll be with you.”
Working it out with the person who hurt me will be hard. We’ll both want to run away, get defensive or cry. It may even be uncomfortable for a while. But we’ll survive.
And then, imagine how refreshing the air will be.
If a fellow believer hurts you, go and tell him—work it out between the two of you.
–Matthew 18:15 (MSG)
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If you are in Greater Vancouver on September 24, you might want to join me in some love mischief and walk for reconciliation in Vancouver. “The Walk for Reconciliation is a positive movement to build better relationships among Indigenous peoples and all Canadians. This bold vision calls on every one of all ages, all backgrounds, all cultures and all faiths to come together as communities and as individuals,” says Reconciliation Canada. “The act of walking and sharing our stories joins us in a commitment to create a new way forward for reconciliation. Join and support the spirit of ‘Namwayut – We are all one.”