Category Archives: Childhood

Notice Me

Posted on May 5, 2023 by Esther Hizsa

As soon as the participants started arriving at the retreat centreI noticed something in meelbowed to the front and shoved my self aside. She wanted a hug from everyone and pouted when she didn’t get it.At the dinner table,she told … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, compassion, Easter, Poetry, Reflections | Tagged , , , , , , | 4 Comments

What Story Do You Need to Return to?

Posted on February 19, 2021 by Esther Hizsa

“Something in you gets irritated when you think about anyone being a victim,” Donna said in a focusing session hours after I wrote last week’s blog post. “Yes. It’s like a painful ball in my throat.” “You might want to … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, compassion, Lent, Mystical, Prayer, Reflections, Spiritual Direction | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

What Are You Unwilling to Feel?

Posted on February 12, 2021 by Esther Hizsa

I can’t stand it when someone goes into victim mode and defends their right to be there. The story goes something like this. “This woman cut in line in front of me after I’d been standing there for fifteen minutes. … Continue reading →

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Let

Posted on February 4, 2021 by Esther Hizsa

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light, and God saw that the light was good. God said, “Let there be a vault between the waters” and “let the water under the sky be … Continue reading →

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Joyful Mysteries and Silent Dreams

Posted on November 20, 2020 by Esther Hizsa

“Let there be Esther,” I heard God pronounce, speaking right into my life-long struggle to exist. During the Ignatian prayer retreat I was leading last week, I had a chance to pray with one of my “joyful mysteries.” As I … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, Creation, Ignatian Spirituality, Poetry, Prayer, Praying with the Imagination, Reflections | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

What My Heart Wanted to Hear

Posted on February 7, 2020 by Esther Hizsa

  A friend asked if I had written any poems about loneliness. I hadn’t. Then I listened to Brad Aaron Modlin’s poem “What You Missed That Day You Were Absent from Fourth Grade” and Pádraig Ó Tuama talk about it. … Continue reading →

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Arms Wide Open

Posted on October 18, 2019 by Esther Hizsa

Last week I was in Cochrane, Alberta attending a week-long course for spiritual directors. The first night I anticipated the Will-I-fit-in? jitters, but instead, I found myself unconcerned about whether I belonged or not. I was beginning to relax into … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, community, Humour, Reflections, Spiritual Direction, Stories, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

The Best Day Ever

Posted on August 2, 2019 by Esther Hizsa

This is the second post about what happened on my 8-day silent retreat in July. If you haven’t read last week’s post, I encourage you to do that before you read today’s. “I’d like you to pray the third exercise … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, Ignatian Spirituality, Prayer, Reflections, Seed Cracked Open, Spiritual Direction, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Helping Each Other Make It Home

Posted on June 21, 2019 by Esther Hizsa

As you can imagine, I have been reflecting on the love mischief of tears and paying attention to what has come to my awareness. Five truths have emerged. 1. I didn’t deserve to be bullied. That statement alone brings me … Continue reading →

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The Love Mischief of Tears

Posted on June 14, 2019 by Esther Hizsa

“Find your pitch and hum it,” Donna said on the first morning of the seventh annual SoulStream Partner Gathering at Sorrento Centre. We hummed in harmony and in unison following her instructions. Then she stopped and remarked how beautiful we … Continue reading →

Posted in Childhood, community, Prayer, Reflections, Stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments