Advent 4: The Star Appears

Posted on December 20, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

Blessed are you,
agreeing to stand still long enough
to let your eyes adjust to the darkness
until the starlight begins to appear,
the dawning of God’s promises.
–Kate Bowler, A Blessing for Open Arms

Be still, my friend,
and breathe with me.
Let us open our arms
and cradle our anxious hearts
as our eyes adjust to
to the dark
and the starlight appears.

What was promised
is dawning:

the knowing
that God does not wait to give peace
until all is well
but when it is yet to come,

the belief
that difficulties can enlarge us,

the trust
that, even now, while
pain grabs,
dread hovers,
and overwhelm is one disappointment away,
God is holding us
as securely as Mary held her newborn,
God is wiping our brows and offering His hand
as we labour to give birth,
and God, Herself, is birthing us anew.

All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it’s not only around us; it’s within us. The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We’re also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance. That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don’t see what is enlarging us. But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.–Romans 8:22-25 (MSG)

Credits and References:
The Iris Nebula by Gianni. Used with permission.
A Blessing for Open Arms by Kate Bowler in A Weary World Rejoices
The Star Appears by Esther Hizsa, 2024
The Virgin Mary with Baby Jesus by Thiên Long. Used with permission.

© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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Advent 3: God Incarnate

Posted on December 13, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

Saturday morning, I stirred the pot on the stove
and noticed the contents were too watery.
I felt churning in my stomach
and butterflies in my chest.
Translation:
If this doesn’t work out
I can’t handle it.

This is what puts me over the edge?
Date squares that might not turn out?
I guess I shouldn’t have doubled a new recipe.

Three days before, my ninety-one year old mother called 911.
As I looked for her in the busy emergency department,
I noticed something different in my mouth.
My tongue kept returning to the ragged gap in a molar, hoping it wasn’t true
as Mom called out in pain from time to time.
Four hours later, she was given a Tylenol with Codeine and whisked off to x-ray.
An hour later, the doctor sent her home.
A pulled muscle.

I got Mom’s Tylenol in blister packs
and took her for her first-ever massage.
A trip to the dentist confirmed
I needed even more dental work than planned.

By Friday, Mom’s pain settled down, and
I was getting used to the idea that I would be spending
so much time at the dentist
and so much money.

I thought I was fine.

But Saturday morning, making date squares,
I learned I wasn’t.
My body was calling 911.
It needed to be heard, felt,
taken for a walk, and comforted.
Losing a part of itself so suddenly was a shock.
My body needed compassion and time to recover.

God, incarnate in my body, told me 
how I needed to be saved.

The mind deceives. The body never lies.
Listen to the wisdom of the body. Hear its truth.
–Thomas Keating, Open Mind, Open Heart

Credits and References:
Photo of a person stirring a pot by Teona Swift on Pexels. Creative commons
God incarnate by Esther Hizsa, 2024
Photo of dog by Jean Alves on Pexels. Creative Commons.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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Advent 2: The Meeting Place

Posted on December 7, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

Blessed are you …
Telling the truth about where you are…
Because this is precisely the place
where God will meet you.
–Kate Bowler, A Blessing for Telling the Truth

All shall be well.
God is always with us.
There is nothing to fear.

I know that

but the truth is
something in me doesn’t believe it.
There’s no use pretending it does
or trying to convince, coerce or ignore that part of me.

Anxious unbelief is in my body,
and it’s not budging.

So, this is where I must wait.
You promised you’d meet me here,
said you’d leave the ninety-nine parts of me that are doing fine,
find this lost one,
and bring her home
safe in your arms.

As I imagine that,
I feel my body relax a little.

I think about You
gestating in Mary’s womb
taking on a body,
becoming contained.

I think of You
contained in my body
as it senses Your heartbeat,
feels Your movements
and waits
for what words
cannot do.

Which one of you, having a hundred sheep and losing one of them,
does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness
and go after the one that is lost until he finds it?
–Luke 15:4 (NRSVUE)

Credits and References:
Nativities Festival by The Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception. Used with permission.
A Blessing for Telling the Truth by Kate Bowler in A Weary World Rejoices
The Meeting Place by Esther Hizsa, 2024
Lost Little Lamb by Matthew Kirkland. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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Advent 1: Your Yes

Posted on November 29, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

The angel went to her and said, “Greetings, you who are highly favoured!
The Lord is with you.”
–Luke 1:28 (NIV)

You come to us,
as you did to Mary
and ask if we will bear Christ 
already seeded in us.

Like Mary, 
we don’t know how this will be.
Most of the time, 
we don’t even know
if we can sustain a yes 
for more than a few minutes now and again.

That doesn’t seem to stop You
from coming,
turning our thoughts on their heads
and showing us
that we’ve already 
given birth to Glory
and there is more to come.

Your yes
is deeper than ours
and so solid 
we can lay out on it
with our arms wide
open.

The secret is simply this: Christ in you! Yes, Christ in you bringing with him
the hope of all glorious things to come.
–Colossians 1:27 (Phillips)

Credits and References:
Leonardo da Vinci, Annunciazione photo by Pom’. Used with permission.
Your Yes by Esther Hizsa, 2024
3 Angels by terren in Virginia. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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This Long Night

Posted on November 22, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

And if the morning never comes,
I’ll be here for whatever does.
–Paul Zach, If the Morning Never Comes

I keep hoping.
Of course, I do.
Who wouldn’t want
to be seen, heard and loved
by the ones born to do that?

And while You promise
to reconcile all things,
the morning I long for
may never come
in my lifetime.

That’s hard
and sad

and so,
You give me a song,
a place
to weep with You
in this long night.

Credits and References:
“Night Cruising, Pacific Ocean” by Clickrbee. Used with permission.
This Long Night by Esther Hizsa, 2024

© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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My Last Coins

Posted on November 16, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

I hold back, 
make myself small. 
Maybe no one will notice, 
no one will hear the clink 
of my measly offering.

A part of me scoffs,
“Why bother?
It won’t make a difference to the church.
Why not have one last meal?”

I finger the coins in the pocket
of my threadbare coat.
A man in a fancy suit
tosses in a hundred-dollar bill
and then another!
A wave of fatigue
washes over me.

I’m so tired–
tired of scrounging,
worry,
and wondering if God really cares
for orphans
and widows.

Do You even see me? I pray,
drop my coins onto the plate
and return my hands to empty pockets.

I’m almost out the door
when a man speaks loudly.
Everyone stops to listen.

He talks about me.
He praises me
because, unlike the others who gave out of their riches,
I gave out of my poverty
all I had to live on.

I break into a cold sweat.
I want to disappear,
take these words away
and hold onto them forever

but God says something more.
He clears his throat and repeats,
“She’s given away all she had to live on.”
and waits.

Then he smiles
as a woman, I’ve never met,
takes my arm
and invites me to dinner.

The Eternal looks after those who journey in a land not their own;
He takes care of the orphan and the widow.
— Psalm 146:9 (Voice)

Credits and References:
Widow’s Mite by Royce Bair. Used with permission
“My Last Coins” by Esther Hizsa, 2024.
Christ healing Peter’s mother-in-law by Rembrandt, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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The Patience to Wait

Posted on November 9, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?
Can you remain unmoving
till the right action arises by itself?
― Lao tzu, Chinese philopsopher, 6th century BC

 

El-roi, the God who sees me

sees me

trying to settle my mud
stirring up more
striving to find
clarity

and shows me

a tiny bud on my Christmas cactus
then another,
and another.

Peace is given
and trust.

The right action
will arise.

In returning and rest, you will be saved.
In quietness and trust you will find strength.
–Isaiah 30:15 (Voice)

Credits and References:
“Patience” by IShutterToThink. Used with permission.
The Patience to Wait by Esther Hizsa, 2024.
“Patience” by Alistair Nicol. Used with permission. 
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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Here Now

Posted on November 2, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

Between my father’s passing
and the spreading of his ashes,
my mother whispered to her husband,
“I miss you.”
I hear in her words how much he loved her
and she, him.  

I think about my father 
with us now
as promised in scripture.
In God, we live and move and have our being,
nothing separates us,
we are in Christ.
Christ is with us
here
now

and so is my dad–
not as he was,
limited by experiences,
wounded by his past,
untethered, 
unfree,
but as he is now
at home in his true essence
enveloped in love
unfettered,
full of joy, peace and love.

This father, I have only glimpsed 
from time to time
This father I do not know.
“You weren’t there,”
I say.

In reply, I hear,
“I’m here now.”

And I feel myself
a little more tethered
a little more free.

The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying:
“I have loved you with an everlasting love;
I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.
–Jeremiah 31:3 (NIV)

Credits and References:
“Drop” by rjp. Used with permission.
Here Now by Esther Hizsa, 2024
“Calmness” by Maria Eklind. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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The Penny Drops

Posted on October 25, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

The penny drops,
and enlightenment
is eclipsed
by the realization that
what had to be pointed out to me
was obvious to everyone else.

Wonder hardly got a foot in the door
before embarrassment
shoved past her.

Still, I’m glad I see now
what I couldn’t see then.
It helps me be kind.

And I’m grateful someone 
was brave enough
to speak up
and didn’t make
a big deal about it.

How exquisite your love, O God!
How eager we are to run under your wings. . .
You’re a fountain of cascading light,
and you open our eyes to light.
–Psalm 36:7,9 (The Message)

Credits and References:
Conversation by YoungDoo M. Carey. Used with permission.
The Penny Drops by Esther Hizsa, 2024.
All the Beauty That’s Inside (hand holding flowers) by Βethan. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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The Demon of Resentment

Posted on October 18, 2024 by Esther Hizsa

We had a great plan. 

Then, bit by bit,
what took shape
changed
and changed again
until I was left with 
more than my share of work
and responsibility
along with enough resentment
to keep me awake at night.
What could I do
to right this ship?
I wanted to enjoy the smooth ride 
everyone else seemed to be having.

Compassion may come in the night,
but rarely wisdom.

In the morning, I hoped something
in Pray as You Go
might change my perspective,
but it was just another story
that didn’t apply to me

until the second reading.

I heard “by the finger of God 
I cast out the demons.”
While I don’t see resentment as a demon,
I wondered if God might want to
relieve me of it.

So, I set it aside for a moment.

What if, not in every case, but in this one,
I chose to accept this cup of suffering.
What if I chose to give more
and do more than my share
so my friends could take it easy?

I let that sink in
and sensed I could do that. 

This time, anyway. 

Dare to love and to be a real friend. The love you give and receive is a reality that will lead you closer and closer to God as well as those whom God has given you to love. –Henri Nouwen, The Inner Voice of Love

Credits and References:
“Two hands, one cup” by Svein Halvor Halvorsen. Used with permission.
The Demon of Resentment” by Esther Hizsa, 2024.
“A Cup of Love” by charcoal soul. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2024.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2024.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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