It’s a new year, and I would love to leave my old identity behind.

Remember in “Undoing My Life” God asked me to let go of my identity as the Rejected One? That undoing continues whenever I feel rejected.

I hate it when that happens. I always want to do something about it so I never feel that way again. But in my last spiritual direction session, I was invited to look for what God was already doing.

Soon afterwards a friend told me her granddaughter had come for another sleep-over at their place. Knowing “Amy” is on the autism spectrum, I suspected this might be a challenge, even though she and her cousins have been coming regularly for years and look forward to it.

I remembered hearing about the previous time Amy was there. It was getting late, and the seven-year-old was still awake.

“I miss Mom and Dad,” Amy had said. She squeezed her eyelids shut and pressed her fingers into them to hold back the tears. “I want to go home.”

Even after Amy talked with both parents on the phone, she couldn’t be consoled. She put on her coat over his pyjamas, and my friend took her home.

This time when Amy came for a sleepover, she came out of her room at ten o’clock. Once again she held back tears as she talked with her mother on the phone. But this time, she hung up and said bravely, “I’m going to stay.”

My friend lay down with her for a while. Eventually, Amy fell asleep.

Because of her autism, Amy finds intense feelings like anger and excitement difficult to contain. She is compelled to do something to get them out of her body. Now my friend realized loneliness has a similar effect. It was hard for Amy to let this big feeling pass.

Though Amy may not have been aware of it, God was with her, holding her while it did.

And God is also with me, holding me as the big feeling of rejection comes and goes.

When you pass through the waters,
    I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
    they will not sweep over you.
–Isaiah 43:2

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Love Mischief for the World

Here’s some touching love mischief 19-year-old Erica’s been up to in Calgary, Alberta. http://calgaryherald.com/health/family-child/from-hardscrabble-to-scrabble-thanks-to-the-alex. Erica, you are awesome!

What love mischief are you and God doing to care for the earth?
 Let me know and I will include it in an upcoming post.

Credits and References:
The first image from a collage I did.
“Good Shepherd” from  St John the Baptist Anglican Church, Ashfield, New South Wales. Image from Wikipedia Commons.
“Love” by Dustin Gaffke. Used with permission.
Note: names and a few details of this story have been changed to protect the persons’ privacy.

© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2016.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016.  http://www.estherhizsa.com